May 2026 Reflections
What A Month
So many changes happened this month, and yet here I am, continuing to persist. My depression has been waning, which is a wonderful thing, and I am finally finding my way back into a productive rhythm. The beginning of this month really threw me off, but I am happy to report that by the end of it, I managed to get back on my feet and even conquer a few fears that had been holding me back.
May was the month we received the news that my younger cousin will be moving into the family home in hopes of making it in Los Angeles. This is a huge transition in her life, and part of me is genuinely excited for her. I am happy that she has the opportunity to pursue her dreams and move closer to family.
The other part of me, though—the part that is still healing—has struggled with the news. Those feelings stem from the fact that I no longer have a home of my own or a space that belongs solely to my immediate family. The homes that once held so many memories are gone because of the fire, and the family home we are staying in now is the last place that remains unchanged from my childhood. Of the three homes that once anchored our family, only one remains.
It didn’t help that May was also the month my grandmother finalized the sale of the plot of land to another family. There is something so permanent about that. So final.
While I am grateful for new beginnings and the opportunities that come with change, the realization that I won’t have a place of my own again until the new house is built can feel overwhelming at times. Some days, the weight of it all is difficult to carry. Still, I know I have to keep moving forward, buckle down, and continue working toward my goals despite the emotional and physical setbacks.
In other news, I HAVE BEEN VLOGGING!
Next week, I’ll be editing my first vlog and posting the full version on the paid tier of my Substack. I’m excited to start documenting what it actually takes to build a podcast, especially now that it has been two years since Season One was released.
I am both nervous and excited, but I see this project as a way to hold myself accountable to the goals I’ve set for myself. So be prepared to see me living in the library all summer long as I work on bringing Season Two to life.
I love you all and am deeply grateful for your support, encouragement, and kindness. Truly.
More to come soon.
Love,
The Swan